Friday, July 12, 2013


If I had a truck like this I'd be the Mack Daddy of Jerkwater Junction, Indiana. I'd head into town, pick up the hotties and take them to the Dairy Queen for all-you-can-eat chili dogs and  banana splits. We'd get all fucked up on cheap whiskey and Xanax and I'd show them the scars from my bone marrow transplant then impress them with stimulating conversation and tales of my misspent youth.
 Most of the chicks in town are on public assistance and meth, so they can stay up much later than I can, 'cause I have to work in the morning. I'd fall asleep and they'd rifle through my pockets for cash and prizes.
But, It's all good. I'd stumble out of the trailer in the morning, fire up the dually and head to work hung over and broke, but none the worse for wear.

But alas, I haven't got a cool ride like the one pictured above, so it'll be another dull and uneventful Friday night.


  1. A nice truck, a sweet meth queen, cheap whiskey and Xanax, the stuff that dreams are made of mate.

  2. I need this truck for the following, family road-trips, wood hauling, junk hauling, improve my neighborhood/self-esteem, taking my kid to school, when it snows and just because it is just wicked cool! Adios!

  3. That is a priceless short story!

  4. What kind of weirdo works on a Saturday? And yeah as the old adage that was taught to me as a young lass by my late great grandmother goes, "Always f@#* a dude with a truck. Don't go too far with a guy with a car. Never trifle with a man on a motorcycle unless his name is Michael." Needless to say, she was pretty nuts but she did have specific instructions on interacting with the opposite sex depending on what kind of vehicle he owned.