Tuesday, June 18, 2013

The Old Man and the Bee

A Hemingway-esque study on man's eternal struggle with Nature


Carpenter Bees are plentiful and destructive around The Compound. These harmful pests bore holes in the unpainted surfaces of both hovel and chicken coop, causing untold damage and misery. These dangerous insects must be approached with extreme caution and cunning.

In this dramatic, never-before-seen video, with only the help of the staff cameraman, I combine the skills of ancient aboriginal blow-gun hunters with the stalwart, audacious bravery of Marlin Perkins to capture one of these elusive and insidious creatures alive and unharmed. All done at great peril with little regard for my own safety.

7 comments:

  1. All hail the fearless Great White Hunter, just how the Duke would've done it man.

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  2. Had to come back for seconds Herm, it's awesome ingenuity and a serious size bee. Are they a solitary beast ?

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  3. It takes balls to blow a bee through a straw.

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  4. Yep Whitey, they don't swarm like other bees. The can drill a perfect 3/8 inch hole in hard wood as cleanly as any sharp drill bit.
    My fear is that they'll cross-breed with recently introduced Africanized Killer Bees, creating a swarm of predatory mutants capable of boring holes in the skulls of sleeping humans. Victims will waken as zombies with a sticky puddle of brain juice on their pillows and not a thought in their heads.

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    1. A truly horrible contemplation, we could all end like politicians, eek.

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  5. It takes more than just balls Laura, it takes precision, perfect timing and nerves of steel.

    You may notice the sound of the chicken at 0:25 who laughed at my first failed attempt in a derisive and mocking manner. Very disrespectful.

    That chicken is no longer with us and was quite tasty.

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