Sukiyaki Suzy was fast with an Uzi
She carried it most of the time
She was the knock-kneed Ninja Railroad cop
Who could break a man’s neck with a karate chop
On the Tokyo-Yokohama Line
She was quite the sensation on that small Island Nation
Her granddad marched the boys in Bataan
And though it rendered her infertile, she wore a tight Spandex girdle
And glasses just like Elton John
If a hobo should dare, hop a train with her there
He’d be beaten with a stout bamboo shoot
Suzy’d kick him and bruise him
Completely abuse him
With the toes of her black Go-Go boots
But Suzy was moody
Her demeanor quite gloomy
It seemed life had lost all its magic
She suffered and cried, feeling empty inside
And her demise was fitting yet tragic
With all her days filled with strife, Suzy took her own life
As she lay down on the tracks last September
When a fast moving freight, going ‘bout ninety-eight
Caused her head to be quickly dismembered.
R.I.P Suzy, I'm certain that were she still with us Herm she would be bashfully overjoyed to be remembered so fittingly by the Blogland Bard, there's no rhyming couplets on you brother . . . check my bloglist when you get a-round-tuit.
ReplyDeleteHad to leaf through the old Thorndike Barnhart to look up "bard."
ReplyDeleteThanks on both counts Mate.
This is the coolest ad for Spanx that I've ever seen. Sick rhymes as well MC Hermie.
ReplyDeleteHer BF Teriyaki Teri has never gotten over Suzys early demise...
ReplyDelete"Spanx" wasn't found in the Thorndike Barnhart but a Google search revealed the name of Suzy's mode of dress. No infertility warnings, however.
ReplyDeleteSushi Luci was so distraught she drank four bottles of sake and couldn't make it to the funeral.